For those moments of “wtf is going on?” — I’ll decode what’s happening in your astrology with a personalised 10-min voice message in your DMs breaking it all down for you 📲


You’ll get that relief of “ohhh, that’s why” – plus a game plan with your next steps.


No fluff — just straight-to-the-point answers at a price that won’t make you cringe.

who is this for?

Ok lemme know if this sounds about right:

1. Everything feels heavy, confusing, and like you’re one meltdown away from googling “Is Mercury in retrograde or what!?”
   
2. You’ve had a reading before and just want a quick top-up — a little extra clarity to make sense of your current chaos.
   
3. You’re not quite ready for a full birth chart deep-dive yet and just want a taster to dip your toes into the world of astrology.
   
4. You’ve been working your ass off, trying your damn best, but it still feels like you’re faceplanting a brick wall — maybe it’s your career, your relationships, or your health.
   
5. You don’t need a full reading, you just need someone to peek at your chart and hand you the answers you need on a silver platter.
   
   
   

Sounds like big old “oh god, yes please” to you?

Keep on scrolling then…

after calling this cosmic hotline you will…

👉🏻 Leave with that “holy shit, this makes so much sense” moment — instant relief poured over you like cool water, that you’re not insane, not screwed and not alone.

👉🏻 Finally understand why life feels so rough right now, because your astrology transits show what’s really been stirring beneath the surface.

👉🏻 Have a new lens on your struggles — no, you’re not a failure, the planets are just trying to help you level up

👉🏻 Breathe a whole lot easier because you can see these challenges are happening FOR you, not TO you

👉🏻 Walk away with a practical gameplan you’re actually gonna put to use, so you’ll text me in a week “ok that actually made a HUGE difference!”

what’s included when you say “f*ck yes!” and sign up for the reading:

💬 Ask Me Anything (Well, Almost)

Got something you’re struggling with or can’t stop overthinking? Send me a quick summary of what’s been going on and where you need help — think of it like texting your astrologer when life feels like a hot mess. I’ll tailor your reading to exactly what’s on your heart.

✨ 10-Minute Voice Message
(VALUE: $444)

You’ll get a straight-to-the-point voice message from me (aka your astrologer in your back pocket), breaking down what the heck is going on in your chart right now. I’ll walk you through your current transit and translate the planets’ messages in a way even newbies can understand (dw, you won’t be confused). I’ll suggest what you should do next to lean in to what the planets are trynna communicate with you – maybe a new daily habit or journalling prompt.

plus you’ll get these bonuses 🗝

📩 One Follow-Up Question (72-Hour Window)
(VALUE $222)

After you’ve had a chance to soak it all in, you can ask one follow-up question within 72 hours. Whether you’re like “can you explain that again pls?” or want some more practical tips to try out — I got chu. I’m yours to make use of.

🎇 Full Colour Copy of Your Chart
(VALUE $22)

You’ll get a cute little snapshot of your astrology chart with all the current planetary action laid out. Even if you don’t speak fluent astro (yet), it’s fun to look at and helps you see what’s going on. Frame it, scribble on it, do what you want with it.

📆 1-Week Check-In From Me
(VALUE $333)

 A week after your reading, I’ll pop back in with a lil check-in to see how you’re feeling, what’s shifted, and if you need a loving nudge to keep up with your gameplan. Because I’m not just gonna ditch you after the first message, I’m still here in your corner.

ALL UP ITS VALUE IS

AUD$1021

BUT ALL YOU GOTTA PAY IS

AUD$49

now it’s your turn.

answers to your burning questions to make sure this reading is right for you